Anger can rise within you without your consent if you’re really compressing your feelings and emotions. You must release negative feelings so that it doesn’t build up and cause an eruption. Much like a volcano it is hot and fiery by nature and when awoken impulsively reacts and causes an outcry.
Being angry isn’t the problem, it’s draining the energy that is – from you so that you are in full control of yourself. The adrenaline kicks in when you are angry and there’s no stopping it. Scientifically too much is preparing you to act physically. So when people say they lose control, they really kind of do in a way because of the contributing feeling of adrenaline mixed with anger.
Firstly, you have to recognise your bodies signs of anger. For example, if you feel like you are starting to shake or are shaking you’re probably pretty angry already. Or clenching your firsts. Tension surrounding your torso, arms and shoulders can often be signs too. These are all due to the compression of anger. It’s at the level where we know it is there but we are not showing it to others, yet – in the first stages at least. This is the time to be like – ok I need relax and act to release the energy.
Secondly, take deep breaths, count to 10 if you can’t concentrate just on your deep breaths. Breathing deeply and being present in the moment is a part of meditation and relaxes the body. So when someone says count to 10, do it, because it will help. Count to 10 sounds silly, but it’s a method said by many for a reason. The longer the counting the better.
Thirdly, go and sit down away from what is making you angry. You need to completely relax and pacing around or/and facing the issue isn’t going to relax you, you’ll be boosting the energy even.
Lastly, the most important step of all after relaxing. Think about how much control and power you just lost and gave to something or someone else and affirm to yourself, that you are in control and no one can dim your inner light. Reflect on it. Pull yourself together and enjoy some silence for light meditation, in case after you have to be around what caused your anger.
This is something you should do even if the epitome of the stressful situation and anger has passed, because if you didn’t deal with it then properly (with mindfulness), facing that person or cause again will evoke negative feelings and if it/they provoke you again, add to them.
It is a method of clearing the anger from your body all together, not just the time you need it most. It forces you to self reflect and accept it so you can move on and release the anger.
How do you deal with your anger? What do you think about my thoughts on anger?